I wonder who will tell you…

I wonder who will tell you what others are saying about you?

I wonder if you know the harm that you are doing?

Will your friends find the courage or do they even see it?

Does it take the distance you created between us for me to see it?

Or maybe distance lets it in?

I always saw that trait in you, but thought that’s just the way she is.

But the distance allowed perspective and insight and silence.

How can we create enough distance/perspective/insight to hold ourselves and those we love accountable for the harm that we as humans invariably inflict?

How can we see that our anger no matter how justified cannot leave us unified if indeed unity is the goal?

And if not the goal, then what is the purpose of sharing space and time.

And so I wonder who will tell me what others are saying about me?

I wonder if I know the harm that I am doing?

Will my friends find the courage or do I see it?

Will my friends find the courage or do they even see it?

Does it take distance between us to see it?

Or maybe distance lets it in?

Do you see traits in me, but thought that’s just the way she is?

How can you tell me without the distance allowing perspective and insight

And ending the silence.

(While written in 2019, I am living with these questions now. Deeply feeling the impact of the gifts and offerings of those who love me enough to tell me the truth. I will do my best to be courageous and offer notes as I find the language for this part of my growth journey.)